Generations of Love

"It's true, Christmas can feel like a lot of work, particularly for mothers. But when you look back on all the Christmases in your life, you'll find you've created family traditions and lasting memories. Those memories, good and bad, are really what help to keep a family together over the long haul." (Caroline Kennedy)

Family - generations of love. Grandmother to mother to grandchild. As you might imagine, I'm missing Mom as the Christmas season approaches and remembering those family traditions and memories she helped create in my life. I'm sure many of you have experienced like feelings after you've lost loved ones. I am grateful for all the good memories I have and for the pictures that awake many of those memories. 

Somehow we never took a generation picture with my mother. Don't know how I missed out on that opportunity with the hundreds, even thousands of pictures I've taken over the years since my first grandchild was born. We weren't able to do the five generation pictures that are sometimes printed in our hometown paper here because my grandparents were gone before I had grandchildren, but we could have done a four generation one. Now that picture will have to be only in my heart. 

As those of you who read Sunday's post or get my newsletter know, I'm having a Christmas giveaway contest with the above figurine as the first prize along with one of my books. You have to win a book, you know. LOL. I like writing about families in my stories. I like exploring the relationships in my fictional families and I like sometimes letting those families reach out and pull people into their family circle that aren't actually related by anything but the love in their hearts. That is especially true in my Heart of Hollyhill series with the great bond between Jocie and Wes. (Scent of Lilacs is still a free download if any of you haven't grabbed it yet.) It's true in my Rosey Corner books too with how Lorena finds a forever place in the Merritt family. In the first Rosey Corner book, Angel Sister, generations play an important part in the storyline. 

All that to explain that's why I picked this particular prize - to celebrate families. You can read all the details of the contest on my website here. Entering is easy. An e-mail or a comment here as long as you be sure to leave a way to contact you. For fun, you can tell me something you especially like about Christmas. I've been reading your messages already. Not got them all read yet since I had some of those grandkids visiting this weekend and have been playing catch-up ever since. But here's one of the messages from Jan that seems to sum it all up. 

"My favorite thing about Christmas is the family catching up and being together during this wonderful season. The memories that are made and the tales that are told. The window dressing of Christmas trees and lights and the beautiful music just makes it more fun but it's all about the miracle of God sending his son to earth for our sins."

Family. Memories. Stories. Beautiful lights and music to celebrate the greatest gift - the birth of Jesus.  Yes, Jan, that is Christmas. 

Thanks for reading. 

50 Years and Counting

We had a big day yesterday celebrating our 50th wedding anniversary. It's actually not for a couple more days, but we're hoping to make it. Whether we do or not - and no one is promised tomorrow - we had a great time celebrating family and love yesterday. 

It was a little hard for me to look this fifty year milestone in the face because gosh, that has to mean I'm old. I'm imagining some of you out there counting up in your head to figure out how old I must be. Sometimes I have to think twice about that myself!

Today is the oldest you've ever been and the youngest you'll ever be again. ~Eleanor Roosevelt 

But whatever my age, just look at the beautiful family I now have. We take up a lot of space out in the yard to have our picture snapped even with one of my sweet granddaughters unable to be there yesterday to be part of the picture. (Missed you, Ashley.) And the family will just grow more and more as the grandchildren get older and find their special someones and start having their own families. That's the way life is supposed to be. Lived well and with love and with hope for the future.

Live your life and forget your age. ~Norman Vincent Peale



My dad used to look around when my sisters and I came home with our young families for Sunday dinner and tell my mother, "Just look what we started." And each generation can do that. Look at where an individual family starts and then at all the branches that shoot off from that one couple. 



My beautiful grandchildren make my extra years more than worthwhile. I am so blessed.   

Grandchildren are the crown of grandparents, and parents are the glory of their children. ~Proverbs 17:6 (Gods Word translation)

And I am also blessed to have been given the desire of my heart in regard to my work. That is, writing stories. Age doesn't really matter there because in our minds we can be whatever age is best for the moment or the story. Here are a couple of quotes that give me encouragement for the stories I have yet to imagine and the goals I have yet to reach. 

First Tinkerbell, the wise little fairy in Peter Pan:

   Laughter is timeless.
      Imagination has no age.
         Dreams are forever.

Then C.S. Lewis:

      "You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream."

Thanks for reading. And have you celebrated a big milestone in your life? 

The Saddest Times of Dementia

This is my beautiful mother enjoying her grandchildren forty years ago. At the time, she was younger than I am now and a very loving grandmother. The grandkids thought she was the best. She let them stand at the sink and wash dishes. She pretended to let them help her make doughnuts. She played Rummy with them and didn't always let them win. She had three more grandchildren after this picture was taken and loved them all as only grandmothers can. A good love. A "I believe in you" love. A "you can do anything you set your mind on" kind of love and support. That's a grandmother's job. To spoil a little. To love a lot. And to think grandbaby hugs are a gift without price.

But now she has dementia. Dementia is the name for a group of symptoms caused by disorders that affect the brain. One place I looked said that one out of five people 80 and older have dementia. Then it went on to say that although elderly people suffer from dementia, it is not a normal process of aging. And yet, normal or not, it happens. People with dementia may not be able to think well enough to do things like getting dressed or eating. They may lose their ability to solve problems or control their emotions. Their personalities may change. They may become agitated or see things that are not there. Some of those things have happened to my mother.

Of all the things that do happen to a person with dementia, the worst is the agitation and unhappiness. Not all people who suffer dementia have the uneasy and sometime angry agitation, but many of them do. My husband's mother did not. My mother does. She does so want to "go home." Back to her childhood home. A house that is long gone. And then at other times, she simply wants her husband to show up. He was here just this morning, she'll say, but he didn't tell her where he was going. But a husband is supposed to be with his wife.  Or she saw him in town before she came to the house here. None of that has happened. Nor are there children in the house, but sometimes she needs to go home to see about the kids.

All that is sad. But the saddest thing is how she's forgotten her family. At least the family still living. She hasn't forgotten her parents and sisters who have passed, most years and years ago. She knows them in photos and doesn't seem to have a problem jumping from very old photos to newer ones. The ones she doesn't know are her children and grandchildren. Most of the time she knows me. Most of the time. But sometimes she wants to know where "the other Ann" is. Then there was the day I looked at a picture of her and her grandchildren taken three or four years ago and she knew herself but not them. I'd tell her their names and she'd smile as if remembering a grandkid hug.  But by the time we got to the last person in the picture, she was asking about the first one again. She does seem to remember the old pictures a little better. Or maybe baby pictures simply take her back to a better time and make her happier.

That day with the memories of her grandchildren buried deep under her dementia and no way to bring them back was a saddest day. For her and for me. I look out into the future and think of perhaps someday losing the precious memory of my own children and their children if my mind fades like mother's has. A saddest thought and one there's no reason to dwell upon. We can't predict who will suffer from dementia and who won't. We can hope for better treatments.

Right now, the only "treatment" that seems to help Mom is prayer. I appreciate all my friends who pray for her. My own prayer is that she will have peaceful days as we take it one day at a time, sometimes one hour at a time and try to make it through each of those worst times back to the not as bad times. The times when she's almost her old self and seems to remember the kids and their families. That day we were looking at their pictures, she kept wishing to see them. Whether she can remember their visits or not, she wants those times. As for me, I want to treasure the memories I have right now since none of us can know what tomorrow might bring.

On a happier note, the e-book version of  Words Spoken True is available for the low price of $2.99 on Kindle and Nook and $2.39 for e-readers on Christianbook.com. A great chance for you to give that book a try if you haven't read it. It's not free, but pretty cheap. It is a limited time offer so don't wait too long to check it out if you're interested. Also I'm getting ready to send out a newsletter tomorrow with a new giveaway to celebrate Scent of Lilacs being back in print with a new cover. Fun happenings. If you don't get the newsletter, I'll let you know about the giveaway on Wednesday - if I don't forget it's Wednesday the way I did last week. But I made up for it on Thursday. Or sign up for the newsletter on my website.

Thanks for reading. And remember you have three more chances to throw your name in the hat to perhaps win a copy of Scent of Lilacs. Leave a comment on this post or on Wednesday's post or on Jocie's blog tomorrow night and get another entry.

The Wheels Turn

It's been a grandkid weekend that started on Thursday night and won't end till late tomorrow night. A couple of the kids are a little homesick. The other two aren't showing much signs of wishing for home. But for sure, I'm one tired grandmom. The twins are sweet as they can be, but two three-year-olds keep you on the move. Especially when they know how to open the doors. I've had to keep my ears tuned for the sound of knobs turning. Barefoot right out in the rain - no problem for them. They love it outside. And two of them like the dogs while the other two are just as happy to keep the dogs back. Of course, the twin who likes the dogs is the one who's allergic to them. Naturally. The six-year-old asked me if she could have Oscar - my big black dog. I said no way. Her dad would have said no way even faster - for different reasons.

Both the boys like to play with cars, but the one in the picture above likes watching those wheels roll. Just the same as his dad did at that age. His dad would lie on the floor and roll his cars or lie on the ground - whichever and watch those wheels the same way. So it's sort of like going back in time to see this little fellow do the same. The other twin likes cars too, but instead of rolling it, he's burying it in the rocks. That's the thing about kids. They're all different. Even when one echoes the past, he's still different - his own unique person. 

That's one of the fun things about having several grandkids - seeing how they are different personalities. Having several makes for a grandma who needs an extra pair of hands. Maybe two extra pairs of hands. I did have help this weekend with my daughter here for several days and then grandpa came home from recording a new project with his gospel group. And he's helping guard the door and has had a lap full of grandkids most of the day. 

It's also been my book release weekend, but I haven't had much time to think about that. I have had a couple of guest blog posts go live.  In the one yesterday, I talk about my romance with words. It's at RomCon and if you want to go make a comment over there, you'll have another chance to win an autographed book along with a box of Bauer's Modjeska candy. So far, your odds of winning would be good. I've got several blog appearances this month. So it's a good thing I like words and putting them together. 

Thanks for reading. Got to turn in and get ready for another full day of grandmothering. The eight year old told me earlier that I had to be nice to them because I was their grandmother. That was right after I made the two girls sit in time out.  Oh, to be told to sit on the couch and do nothing for five minutes. It's all in the perspective, isn't it?

Racing toward their Future

Not many of us can remember being two. If we could, we'd surely be more open to wonder. We'd remember discovering the world bit by bit. My preacher likes to tell young people that he did this or that before they "discovered America." In other words, before they were born. That's sort of how I felt this weekend taking care of my grandsons. They're on the cusp of three, but still every bit two-year-olds right now. And the world holds many marvels for them. Butterflies, macaroni, slides and swimming pools, to name a few. They don't bother trying to hide how they feel. If they're mad, they let you know it. If some brother sneaks up and snatches one of their favorite toys, then they don't keep it a secret. If they fall down, the bump or bruise is grave - for at least five seconds.

I think all that fresh, raw emotion is what makes grandparents enjoy their grandchildren so much. We're getting older. We're ready and able to slow down the clock a little. To sit on a creek bank and watch the frogs, to throw rocks in a pond just for the fun of making a splash, to make up silly stories about chipmunks, or to bounce a little child in the air a dozen times when he giggles and says "Again."  

A neighbor once told me that if she'd known grandkids were going to be so much fun, she'd have had them first. Of course that wouldn't work. We weren't ready to be grandparents then. That's a job you have to grow into, little by little as the gray begins slipping into your hair and the wrinkles come and sit down on your face and settle in to stay instead of just passing by after a smile or two. You understand things better - like the importance of playing hide-and-seek and how it doesn't matter if part of your body is showing in the hiding place as long as your eyes aren't. You know pushing a swing to send that little one up "high as the moon" is one of the most important things a person can do. You know what's ahead. Maybe not exactly, but well enough to know that these early years are to be treasured and enjoyed and that for grandparents they are a bonus not to be wasted or lost in the busyness of life. They - those grandbabies - are life. 

Hope you are enjoying life this week no matter where in the circle of life you are - beginning with your families or sitting back watching some sweet grandbabies. That's what I did this weekend. Well, I can't say I sat back and watched anything. I was running full tilt after them but it was good to see their eagerness for the journey ahead. That's what I want to catch from them - for myself and for my characters. Eagerness for the journey ahead.